fail

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The dark despair of failure. Those depths of acrid, rancid, dissonant putridity. Purple – thick, viscid, slimy, clammy, choking and Stygian – swirling manic whirlpool inside corporeal core.

That feeling that one has failed a precious Parallel Embodied child. Closest companion. Most faithful entity who walks alongside without questioning.

Each and every decision affects this beautiful being – such cogent reverberations – in ways no human mind will ever fully grasp. Yet, just sensing the very peripheral waves, catching those soft crying top notes or unheard vibrating bass notes, is enough to thrust the human soul into the vortex of forlorn, hapless gloom. That is, if the human possesses just a sliver of empathic resonance for Other, and a tiny beam of light shining onto Self. Many, sadly, do not. Yet… Some humans really do. Some humans truly try.

What would one give to understand in full the abundance that thrives within the Canine Angel’s inner world?

What may this human proffer in exchange for this harmonic-rhythmic enlightenment  beneath the mantle of verisimilitude?

Would the knowledge and the weight of its pulchritude and agony annihilate the tenuous human fragility?

No words. No answers. The silence deafens, as the senses listen intently, skimming the surface of myriad textures, smells, tastes, vibrations, images, sounds… Ebbing, flowing, undulating…

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empathic resonance

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Can you hear me bouncing down the stairs? Crash, crush, squish, boom… First the sound of my skull hitting the wall, then my elbows cry against the merciless edges and the joints of each flailing connection pop and plop. Down, down, down, the body a gibbering ragdoll, wordless scream that sounds like a distorted cartoon jingle.

Can you hear it now, as I fit semantic symbols to my pain?

Or are you too engrossed with your navel bowlful of hisses, sighs, shrieks and squeaks? Continue reading

inadmissable

The UnHoly Duo Saga continues. I attended a ‘conciliatory meeting’ with one half of the twinset yesterday afternoon. She had a screaming toddler with her and a mousy little attendant who was introduced as ‘the one who answers the telephones.’

Inside the conciliation room, we proceeded to bring forth our case notes.

Once again, I was chided by this person for not declaring in my rental application form my disability and the detailed specifics of my needs.

We were there to talk about end of lease conflict (I am accused of leaving the premises in a dreadful state) but over and over, this person persists in reiterating the irrelevant – and in fact illegal – demand that I disclose my disability. The fact that she is mentally fixated on this, and repeatedly points to the beginning of my tenancy, i.e. the application form, with threats and insults, is very telling. It shows that this whole fiasco is a direct result of a long festering vendetta centred upon her repeated theme, spun out in as many twisted ways as she and her twin in this fiasco can think of. A libretto of deliberate discrimination, no less. Continue reading