pathways

After the unpleasant and messy task of washing up the dehydrator trays (yes, remember the smelly lamb’s fry that I sliced and dehydrated for Lucy?), I decided to reward myself. I made a new batch of marshmallow-rice-bubble bars today. The little minx Lucy wanted some, but mumma said, “No, no, baby girl, not for Greyhound Princesses, sorry!” She flounced off into the bed and began to furiously scrunch up the sheets into a giant mound, then flopped down onto the bundle with a loud, “Hmmmmfff!” Hilarious.

No, Lucy, you can sulk all you want but you’re not getting any. I chuckled at her, but I think that made her even less pleased. šŸ™‚

This time, I tried a new ‘architecture’ to the piece. I cut up the marshmallows into halves and laid them out on the plate. Then packed the melted mix on top and shaped the whole lot into a condensed block, with wet fingers. If the fingerĀ are not wet enough, the mix will stickĀ to the fingers, but if too wet, of course, you’ll get a soggy mess, so make sure they are Goldilocks-just-right!

I do think I have the best companion in the world. Well, actually, I know everyone who adores their furry child would feel that way, but there we are, to use a quote from the title of Temple Grandin’s most famous book, animals actually really do make us human in the best possible way.

A friend and I were talking about how we’ve all found ourselves in our current places in space and time, the mistakes we’ve made, the regrets or feelings of achievement, and how we are accepting our present situations in life. For me, I have had only two regrets. One was not being there to say goodbye to my beloved father. That is the one biggest regret in my life that will never leave me. I miss him to this day. The other regret is not being strong enough to extricate myself from the manipulative-subjugative-oppressive situationĀ that held me back for almost two decades. However, even the latter regret is a questionable one, because those years of living under subtle gentle tyranny as it were, have served to make me who I am today. So perhaps that shouldn’t count as a regret.

I am happier and more fulfilled than I have ever been. The timing is strange. A middle aged Aspie working on a PhD nearer the end of her life than the beginning, struggling with poverty in a way never before experienced, and yet, I have never been more satisfied with my life. And I now have Lucy. Every time I muse upon this, the Barbra Streisand rendition of On My Way to You plays in my headspace. I bought the album Till I Loved You when I was an undergraduate. That song was one of my favourite from the album, but I had no way of knowing then what it would come to mean to me, the way it does now. Not in my wildest dreams would I have thought I’d meander along this way, and that the song would feature, for me, a Greyhound called Lucy, Like a Charm!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s