le sacre

This video is a repost. I love Pina Bausch. This woman knew about passion in a very cogent, stark and confronting way. Her work lives on forever and grows more and more powerful in the inspiration of those who embrace, resonate with and admire her work.

As a musician, I have always been fascinated by Igor Stravinsky. Le Sacre du Printemps remains one of my favourite works. Stravinsky’s music has very concrete links to the visual and tactile senses, to me, they are not meant merely for ‘listening’ to alone. That said, even though I am not a true synaesthete, I am nevertheless unable to engage merely one sense in conscious isolation, in any case. Pina Bausch’s interpretation of this work is the best I have ever seen. Her work is full of tactile associations, with sometimes overwhelming emotional, psychological and philosophical threads interwoven into a massive confronting tapestry yet so delicately intricate and detailed at the same time.

Both Stravinksy and Bausch are “in-your-face” geniuses. Their work speak things that makes some people uncomfortable, and yet brings immense exhilaration to others. These are no bland, neutral background New Age sonic sensorial stirring in the cosmic atmosphere. These are challenges to spirit, soul, body (senses) and intellect.

Autism, too, is “in-your-face.” Therein lies our strength, but also our vulnerability. We are not to be easily obfuscated, even when we may be easy prey to those who seek to control and manipulate us. This austere, stripped bare and sharply defined existence poses a provocation to those who operate in the realm of nebulous, amorphous and ambiguous morality and systems of engagement and interaction. When we finally wake up and realise we don’t wish to be controlled, cheated, abused and manipulated, and we stand up for ourselves, the repercussions are immense. This is because we hold a bright shiny mirror to the face of our tormentors. We have made them uncomfortable. They feel threatened. And they know they have lost control over their too compliant subjects. Accusations are hurled, sometimes tears even ensue, and the “poor me, how can you treat me this way after all I have done for you,” charge will almost definitely emerge, in one guise or another.

Another common imputation is that we are mentally unbalanced.

In the aftermath of Friday’s Wagnerian drama, among a slew of hysterical accusations and condemnations from a very sad person this morning, I was told, “You have serious problem(s) and I really hope you get help with it” … The irony here, and in many other cases of abuse whether subtle or obvious of autistic persons, is that the people who make such assertions actually themselves suffer from even more seriously deviant personality and mental disorders than our quirky autism.

The final scene of the death of the sacrificial victim is chilling. It is a visual reminder to me that I am determined not to end up that way.

I have been communicating with young Aspies. Some have eating disorders, others are on the verge of breakdown. Whatever their specific circumstances, the common thread of agony is frustration at being unable to break free from other people’s control. I have no grand solution. All I can say is, HANG IN THERE! Keep going – and let your innate Aspie passionate focus and stubborn determination keep you alive.

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